Somehow, my university course leader does not understand the fact that having TWO semesters worth of assignments to do in the space of just ONE semester, as well as being ill and having a relapse, is actually hard/stressful.
On Tuesday morning I was coming down with a fluey type thing, but decided to force myself in to uni for a scheduled meeting with a tutor about one of last semesters assignments as cancelling would be too late notice, I shouldn't of forced myself - I got there to find out that he had gone home!!
Upon e-mailing my course leader with an update of my health and how it had been the worst it had been all year this week, I mentioned this. To which she then defended him, which she does with everything against her module lecturers. So frustrating. Makes me feel as if I've overeacted in telling her.
Also - being at home and not able to do anything gives me too much time to think, which I HATE. My mind is racing. Also - the boyfriend is working all week as it is half term, plus he has panto every night this week. So I can't talk to him much, that sends me thinking all sorts too. He is due to go away to work at a holiday camp later this year, which will obviously affect us A LOT, missing him just when I don't talk to him for a day is hard enough, what will it be like when he moves away for good.
Thats just one of the things i've been over thinking - I've started to think of plan B's for my life, incase things don't go to plan. I am half way through my degree, but my health is at it's worst. I am hoping to get all my essays in and I have all the right motivation, but there is only so much work you can do at a time (as well as resting and everything else you need to fit in!) There is always the 'What ifs....'
I know I shouldn't worry, but having time to myself, my thoughts seem to overrun my head. I know i'll be back to myself soon - in the meantime, this is my outlet! :)
Thanks for listening guys
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